One and One and One Makes Fun
"...there were three in the bed and the little one said..."
How disturbing is that? I've just tied a Sharon, Lois and Bram song from my childhood (ooh, I've just hinted at my age) to threesomes. 'Cause yes, that's the subject to which the title this time refers.
Being in a threesome is like having that slimming pair of pants for work -- you're able to mix and match them with almost any top...
Wait, that makes no sense. I'm so not a fashion person -- unless it's black, covers next to nothing, and made from silk, satin or lace.
Where was I? Oh yeah, threesomes. If sex is great with one person focusing on your wants, needs, desires and body parts, how could it be anything but better with two people doing the same, right?
Threesomes are like anything else with sex; sometimes they're hot and wet and hard and sexy... and other times they're awkward and weird and you're left with a sticky, uncomfortable feeling -- and possibly one or two people you can't quite look in the eye.
Threesomes (or moresomes) can be difficult for some people to handle, so to speak. When naked with our partners, we're at our most vulnerable -- especially when turned on -- and insecurities can set in. All of a sudden, you may find yourself feeling more aware of the things you dislike about your body, or you may be hyper-aware of someone else's -- especially if they're of the same gender as you.
And, if they're the same gender as you, then there's the chance that you may start to worry that they're better than you and that your partner might like them better, and and and...
But at the same time, you may be totally secure in your relationship and not worry that someone else would be able to screw it up -- in fact, they could only enhance it. It really depends on how you feel going in. Using a threesome in an attempt to solidify or strengthen an ailing relationship is, in my opinion, not the best idea. It may work, but it may enhance all of the problems that already exist.
Now, that's not to say that threesomes are all doom and gloom. On the contrary, they can be great fun. After all, there are two hands looking to please you, two mouths on your favourite spots, the potential of two pussies, two cocks, or a combination of the two for your fun... sounds good, right?
A lot of people have differing advice for what's the best way to go about having a threesome. Whether there should be lots of conversation with the particulars ahead of time, whether it should come about as a result of flirtation and booze, whether it should be a "guest star" invited into an already existing relationship... but really, there's no best way for everyone.
I'd have to say the most important part is just to make sure that everyone involved feels comfortable saying "I'm out" at any point in the proceedings. What can sour the experience more than anything is feeling like crap at some point and not saying so. If you feel like things aren't working out for you as well as they ought to -- especially emotionally or mentally. If you're going to do something that's new to yourself sexually, it's worth it to make sure that it's as positive an experience for you as possible.
posted by Jen on 10:00 PM