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The Whore’s Winter Woes

I don’t know about the rest of you, but I hate being cold. So it makes a great deal of sense for me to live in Canada, especially right in one of the colder cities around.

As a result/protest against the winter weather, I’ve turned my little apartment – my own personal Whore’s Boudoir, if you will – into something resembling a sauna, at least according to some. Granted, the heat isn’t always under my control, but...

Anyhow, what it means is that I’m perfectly comfortable wandering around my apartment bare-assed nakers, if I so desire. As I’ve gotten older (and heavier), I’ve become more comfortable with my nudity, ironically enough. Not that I’ve ever been really paranoid about appearing naked in front of significant others, but as I age, I’ve gotten better at accepting that I have what I have, and if someone doesn’t like it, well... not too much I can do.

However, my naked arse aside, in the past the majority of the boys I’ve dated have either had much higher body temperatures than me and/or didn’t mind the cold, or they lived at home and couldn’t really (or wouldn’t, really) do much about the heat.

One boy in particular used to drive me nuts by untucking my shirt (tucked in to keep me warm, dammit), sometimes using me to warm his cold hands, and he’d routinely try to have sex with me in the basement, beside the big glass sliding doors, in the dead of winter, with the heat completely shut off.

Now, sure, in the fall or spring, 15 degrees may not be terribly cold, especially when you’re coming out of a stretch of negative or single-digit degree weather, but when you’re already chilled and fully dressed, it’s not something you necessarily want to start stripping down in. Especially when the sex is not that satisfying for you.

Or maybe that’s just me.

We’re all different, and some people prefer cold weather, snow and the like – I’ve heard this from both men and women. But do these same people want to be nekkid and/or having sex in the cold? I haven’t heard.

See, I know of the turtle effect – peenies hiding away like scared little ... well, turtles – embarrassing their owners and making them declare, “I was swimming!” I’m also aware of growers vs. showers. Growers are men who appear small or average when flaccid, but who greatly increase when getting hard (or, as I prefer to call them, “pleasant surprises”). This contrasts with showers, men who don’t really change when they get hard (or, as I prefer to call them, “pleasant” – what can I say? I likes the cock). To me, seeing a teeny flaccid peenie isn’t that big of a deal (or disappointment).

But really, I don’t find myself wanting to be naked in the cold. If I’m lying there, shivering, chances are I’m not terribly focused on whatever fun stuff is going on.

Mind you, I think part of me isn’t terribly averse to knocking boots in the snow, on one of those nice, -5 or -10 degree days – if for no other reason than to say I’ve done it. Anyone with me? We could have a whole snowbanko rgy – it would sure take my mind off being cold and winter-grumpy.

posted by Jen on 11:33 AM


Apparently a how-to guide for sex with me. In reality, me just talking about my thoughts and experiences in love, sex and relationships.

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